The Saltlist

Satire in the Age of Letters and Technology- more than just a pinch of it.

An Open Letter To The Gurgaon Police Department

By: Hemul Goel




Dear Gurgaon Police Department,

First of all I sincerely hope that all is well with with you and all those internet jokes (I know you see those Facebook status updates, memes or slogans as jokes and not as a form of people’s expression) circulating by the dozens aren’t affecting your sharp brains much. Now that I am writing to you let me quickly grab this opportunity to thank you for finally being able to identify and inform the society about a rapist’s time schedule. You sirs, by earlier lecturing us about wearing ‘decent’ clothes, have done a great favour by telling us the time when the beast hidden inside a man is expected to take over his rational self. Now that this secret is out these beasts can legitimately claim control over the roads. Something like “8 baj gaye hain isliye haan ab toh yeh mere baap ki hi road hai”, right? However this can backfire too, as now that the girls are aware of the timings of these beasts they shall stay indoors after 8 p.m. so there is a high possibility of the girls being targeted precisely before 8 p.m. A practical solution for the women would be to stop coming out of the house altogether OR for a change the police could stop trying to directly or indirectly imply upon the women what they ought and what they ought not to do and actually spend some time strategising over how to make this city safer for girls. I however have full faith in you and I am sure that the rules for the female members in your house are same too. No, please don’t raise those eyebrows at what I am saying. I don’t mean to get personal in an offensive manner, rather I am just broadening the picture and showing every female how you policemen ensure that no woman of your family steps out after 8 p.m. It’s extremely thoughtful and righteous of you to set such great examples so that the other chicks (oh! pardon me) can follow the lead.

I respect you for the callousness you displayed while dealing with this matter. Instead of handling the issue properly, the victim was subjected to character assassination. Her statements were called ‘inconsistent’ by Mr. K.K. Sindhu, Gurgaon’s Commissioner of Police
(News Source :
By laying a curfew on women, not only is the police stepping out of it’s area of jurisdiction and encroaching upon a woman’s freedom but also trying to curb their professional development. It’s not a hidden fact that Gurgaon is a actually a major hub for multinational companies and software giants. What about the women employed here? Should she drop her job because of the constant fear of rape that she lives under? What difference does it make whether she works in a pub or a banking firm- the fact that she is empowered and independent, isn’t that enough?Maybe talking straight isn’t the best idea always, probably you’ll understand it better if we start talking dirty. So here’s the deal, the state pays you with our money, so technically you are our servants. Since it is we who pay you we get to decide the kind of services we want you to render so stop preaching and start protecting because the latter shall reduce once you make the city safe enough for women.

Do you have any idea what repercussions your actions or the lack of it could have? Trust me you don’t! The day isn’t far when women will feel that they have had enough and in a bid to prove this women may actually end up abducting a rapist and punishing him in an unimaginable manner – like poking needles into his privates, sticking his privates with a feviquick to his stomach, pouring some hot oil on that organ down there so that the next time some male even thinks of indulging in an act as heinous as rape chills shall run down his spine.
You think that the fairer sex is easily subdued right? Actually women are just waiting in the wings, giving you a chance to set things ‘fair’ or else the dark, the tough side that they keep in control shall force them to take the matter in their own hands! Never mind if it reminds you of a ferocious Mahakaali with her billowing tresses, red tongue and eyes popped out in rage. You got the picture right?

With best wishes and great hopes for the future:
We the Women!


11 comments on “An Open Letter To The Gurgaon Police Department

  1. Mannoj Thakur
    March 17, 2012

    What the police fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them – that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply. They must shed the fences of crippling legacy of bigotry.

    • hemulgoel
      March 17, 2012

      Thanks for your response.

      True that! High time these people understand their duty and take their work seriously. Our police department is definitely not a force to be reckoned with but let’s just hope for the best.

  2. Anant Sharma
    March 17, 2012

    It’s plain sad, that instead of performing the duties they have been assigned to, they’d rather come up with bizarre, ridiculous ideas, that DO NOT make sense AT ALL! The irony is, the rapists, they are out, scot free (to do what they want, as they always do), and the victims are being even more victimized at the name of caution/precaution. It’s sad. And it’s stupid as well!

    And the part where you mentioned how girls would like to treat the rapists, well I’d just suggest watching The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo! 🙂

    But this article was satire at it’s best. Rage, with hints of humour. Awesomely written!!! 😀

    • hemulgoel
      March 17, 2012

      Nice to see some emotion on the issue. It sure is stupid and we wont stop ranting ranting against this stupidity anytime soon.

      Sure, will do. It has been in my list for ‘Must Read/Watch List’ for quite sometime now and now as you have suggested it there’s another great reason to watch it.

      Thanks a lot. I really appreciate that!


  3. Arunima Bhattacharya
    March 17, 2012

    Next the Administration will say “Why do women need to work in offices so far off from their houses? They should stick to community services, and not communicate with men too often, lest they tempt the men.”
    What a smart decision they have taken, Men wont rape women before 8 na? So women get raped because they work late, or wear ‘revealing’ clothes, or talk to strangers. It’s never because some asshole just wants to rape a woman.ow can they say “women can’t work in Gurgaon after 8” ?
    So, if these rapists shift their ‘hangout zone’ to Delhi, they’ll expect the women to go back home at 8? So, the city is supposed to be a no-woman’s place after 8? This is how intelligently they deal with it! Its as if, the women are causing them a problem by making their presence felt in the offices at night. How conveniently they just give orders that women cant work late, instead of rooting out the crime and ensuring maximum and effective security systems.Things will never change this way, evryone will just keep believing in concepts like “appropriate jobs”. “appropriate timing” “appropriate clothes” “appropriate places”.according to Gurgaon Administration, men get aroused only after 8- someone PLEASE talk some sense into The Policemen first.

    • hemulgoel
      March 17, 2012

      Aah they wish they could.

      When someone wants to rape he will, no matter what. It’s a mental sickness NOT proportional to time, place, clothes etc. All these are just stupid excuses for hiding their own incompetence and inability to curb the increasing crime against women.
      Yes Arunima, that is what me, you and many others out there are trying, to talk some sense into these police officers. Again let’s just hope for some change and a better future.
      Thanks for your response!


  4. Aqsa
    March 18, 2012

    love the satire. brilliantly written! and can i say i absolutely love the poster as well!

  5. Raman Bajaj
    March 21, 2012

    Leave besides the police, I have seen people changing attitude like gears…. when they r amongst friends, they also talk sick and cheap and when they r sitting in a group or in front of people like theeir seniors or elders and relatives they comment the same way like we have been doing here on this issue but the reality is that atleast 25% of people (boys) who have been writing comments here definitely would have been involved not in a rape but surely in eve teasing…….. what else? Police…… they just r just good for nothing.. i have alwaya seen them asking for bribe from bikers in late evening or night… checking “pollution under control” certificate at 2:00 clock mid-night because 16 bikes had been stolen in last 20 days but all the documents less PUC certificate is stolen bike….. can some one tell how is pollution and theft inter-related…….. you can’t deal with Police atleast with Haryana Police………..

  6. hemul goel
    March 24, 2012

    I see you have some major grievances with the police(which are right) but the solution definitely doesn’t lie in being pessimistic about the same. We aren’t even very happy about the current situation but one must make an effort to deal with it. However let me add that you need not think that all guys who have commented above would have been involved in eve teasing, that’s a bit negative. Also ‘eve teasing’ is a very generic term you are using to cover up a major issue.

    Thanks for your response.

  7. aparna
    April 12, 2012

    It is sad how many excuses the police as well as administration comes up with for not doling out a punishment fit for these people. All this is doing is increasing the incidents… and it is not about to happen anytime soon. Women need to learn self defence and f*** their happiness then and there… maybe cutting off their testicles would make them sober. How in the world do men even get the pleasures from these

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This entry was posted on March 16, 2012 by in Democracy, Governance and Human Interest, National and tagged , , .

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